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ANVITHA

ANVITHA

Anvitha is 13 today Tarun - Our daughter turns teenage. I remember the day when you put her in my arms and her tiny tots touched my chest. I did not know how to love her, In fact I was scared of touching this little pink looking body. She made me look at her; as I let her suckle my body to satisfy her hunger. She just looked like you. Same forehead, same lips, and I waited for her to open the eyes - I wanted to see the same brown eyes too. I told you that we will call her “Anvitha”. She is a result of our love Tarun; she is a gift of God to us. We have been one and we will always be. I think it’s right time for her to know the facts of her life; I think it’s a time when she meets you. She must know the man who showers so much love on her from an unknown corner of the world.

“Anvitha, beta you are 13 today, a teenage girl, a grown up girl.”

“Yes, maa. Thank you for buying me this smart phone.”

“Anu, that’s a gift your father has sent for you. I have another gift for you”

Anvitha was spell bound. She had never heard this word “father” in my communications to her.

(She in fact never bothered to explore this untouched corner of her life. I always gave her more than we as parents could have given. I always had you within me. I always knew how you would want to nurture our daughter. You always wanted me to pour love of your share on Anvitha in your absence. I have been doing it for all these 13 years - I am sure that is the only reason she never needed to talk about her father to her till now.)

“Anvitha, you are a grown up girl, and I am happy to have you as my daughter. But you are not only my daughter, you are our daughter. You are a daughter of me and TARUN.”

She rushed to me and gave me a tight hug, we both tried to hide tears rolling out. “Maa, I always wanted to know this, but I feared you being hurt. Knowing the name of my father would have made no difference in my life. But the efforts to know that would have hurt you, it would have put you in pain, and that would have made difference in my life.” Our daughter has really grown up.

“Anu, I just wanted you to know this at right time. There is no pain inside me. You are a result of our love. We have begged for you to God. You are the best gift your father has given me. I and your father have always cherished every single day as your parents.”

“But then why don’t we stay together maa?”

This left me speechless for a while. I wanted her to know everything about me, Tarun and our life with and without him.

“Anu, even before I and your father joined our hands to urge God to send you to us, God already had sent an angel to his home. He had to take care of that angel; he became her father before he could be yours. Believe me every single day he has showered us with our share of love. He has not given an inch less to either of us. He has been around us protecting, caring and giving all the love and care we deserve, from wherever he been.”

“Mumma, can I meet him for once?” I could not see her expressions properly, as tears blurred my vision. “He stays far away I will ask him to come and see you, as and when he can.” I am sure Anu too could not see my resisted tears blurred her vision too.

(I never knew that my daughter is so grown up that she would handle this conversation with enough maturity and calm. I feared deep inside about this being her appropriate age. Were 13 too early? Was I doing good to her by introducing her to her father? Will this bring happiness or turbulences in our lives? Her right to know about his father made me take this decision; I had to tell this to her.)

Anvitha and Tarun are the best decisions of my life and I am not all worried about how things will be now on?

“Tarun, Anvitha, wants to meet you.” I called you. It took me a while to tell you those words which let you astounded. I am sure the silent moments were result of choking caused by tears. I knew I had to wait for your coming. It has been 13 years that I am seeing you in Anvitha. It was the first decision that you made without talking to me. I knew that you will have to go to your daughter when you left us on 7th day of Anvitha’s birth. You handed her in my hand after you kissed her forehead, and you did not need words to convey what all you were about to do. You arranged everything for me and Anvitha. Many times I felt you being around us like a shelter protecting us. But every day that passed without gazing in your brown eyes was a day not worth living.

The wind chimes are singing new songs; air smells more flowery; my heart is beating faster today. I am staring the road to the gate of my house for no reason. I am singing all our favorite songs since morning. I have a smile on my face which is not going away for a moment. Are you coming Tarun? I am sure you are – my heart knows it every time you are coming.

Anvitha looked up in your eyes.

“Don’t I look like you papa?” Every night when she slept next to me, I thought she is growing up – I was wrong. I saw our daughter like an infant in your arms, when she hung on your shoulders. You two loved each other so much. Anvitha lived her 13 years in your arms that night. You wanted to give her all she has waited for all these years, what all you wanted to give her. Every time you kissed her forehead I was in tears.

“You are the best papa.” Anvitha told you while you were singing for her to make her fall asleep. Smile on her face said a lot to us on behalf of her heart.

Next morning we were back to our routine; neither had she asked anything about you nor did I say.

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