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It doesn't matter

"It doesn't matter now Mansi, whether you live or die! I don't care and don't expect anything from me."

Mayur's bitter words from six months ago, crushes me, and still resonate in my ears. I do accept the mistake was mine. After dad passed away, I should have discussed it with Mayur, before inviting mom to come and stay with us. Why did I assume that Mayur would not object? Why did I believe that Mayur and I would be on the same page?

But that was not the case. When Mayur found out, he thrashed in anger. The incident happened so suddenly, leaving me flabbergasted and feeling completely dejected. Thank God! Mom wasn't at home at that hour, she'd gone for a prayer meeting. Of course, then we separated. I came to mom's house with her. My heart sank with shattered emotions. I was split between love for my husband and concern for my lonely mother. Moreover, every now and then, I tried my best to persuade Mayur, but he failed to understand and stood by his guns with a rigid mindset.

Mayur wasn't used to staying alone. He depended on me for a lot of things. But I know, being the size of a mountain, his male ego will never acknowledge this fact.

Today after the car accident, he is in a hospital; in the ICU; injured and helpless. His words hurt me a lot, but my feelings for him never diminished. Keeping his abusive tirate at bay, and ignoring my painful heart, I entered the hospital.

On the third day, Mayur regained consciousness. Mom didn't like it that I stayed by his side all the time, and didn't leave the hospital even for a minute.
"Mom, I'm his wife, and that truth will never change."

The doctor gave permission to meet, and I went inside the room to see Mayur. He averted his gaze and was looking blankly in the opposite direction. His features had contorted with remorse. I went and sat on the chair near the bed. Lacing his hand in mine, I began gently,
"Mayur, whatever ensued between us, it doesn't matter now. Let's think it was a nightmare, forget about it and make a fresh start."

When he turned towards me, his teary eyes seemed skeptical, as if he couldn't believe what I was saying. Not only that, I also felt he had many other doubts, making me anxious in the process. I wanted him to open up.
"Mayur! After all that has transpired, your accident, our painful separation, don't you wish for us to be together again?"
Gripping my hand with both of his, he squealed,
"No Mansi no! You're getting me all wrong. Life has been a living hell without you. I'd be a fool not to have you back."
I was relieved a bit.
"Then what is it? Why do you look so uncertain?"
He chewed his lips reluctantly and hesitated before replying,
"Will your mom forgive me? Will she agree to come and stay with us?"

My eyes twinkled with joy as my heart leaped out in my radiant smile. My chuckling nearly shook me with happiness.
"Don't worry, mom will be just fine. And yes, she'll come and stay with us. Thank you Mayur."
Pulling me on the bed beside him, he enveloped me in his embrace, before commenting lovingly,
"Don't embarrass me anymore by saying thank you. She is our united responsibility. I love you Mansi! You truly are my better half."

Shamim Merchant, Mumbai

Shades Of Simplicity

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