"Mrinalini .... Mrinalini !! What were you going to do?!?"
This question was constantly echoing in my subconscious mind. It felt weird when I came back to my senses. Opening my eyes, a realization sunk in; I was lying on the floor. A glimpse at the dupatta hanging from the fan, reminded me, that I was about to commit suicide. I had lost my balance and fallen off, as the stool slipped, moving away from my range. Then when, and for how long I remained unconscious, who knows!
Bracing to a sitting position, I hugged myself and cried profusely. My painful heart was drenched with grief and frustration.
Anticipation of innumerable dreams fluttered in my eyes, when I tied the knot with Vivek. Vivek; Smart, handsome and rich. Any girl would be eager to take my place. Nonetheless, in the last two years, only I know the mental and emotional anguish I have endured. Vivek was modern, but for name sake only. His tyrannic nature crushed me from inside. Moreover, my identity was lost behind his authoritative shadow.
Although I had wished to be with Vivek for a longer haul, with the kind of ruthless treatment that I am receiving, all heartfelt desires to make this marriage work, have literally died in the couple of years gone by. Now there is only growing resentment between us. Vivek barely gave me a chance to talk. Forever I felt so misunderstood and unheard, that my thoughts and feelings have suppressed within me.
"Shut up you foolish woman! You're completely wooden-headed and brainless! Couldn't my mom find a better match for me?"
Relentlessly having tolerated such cruel remarks, have left me lonely and fearful in this hopeless relationship.
The doorbell rang, and I jumped in panic, wondering if Vivek had come home early. Anxiously I peeped in the eyehole, and was relieved to see my friend Preeti. She was devastated to see my plight.
"Mrinalini !! What happened?"
Upon seeing her, I collapsed, and tears flooded down my cheeks all over again. She immediately wrapped me in her embrace and tried to pacify my pity self. My endurance had reached its highest peak. Preeti was not unaware of my situation. She was flabbergasted to see the dupatta hanging from the ceiling fan and hissed with rage.
"This is the limit! Enough is enough! Now there's absolutely no need to live with that devil. Not even a minute. Do you get it?"
Preeti gave me a lecture on me being educated and whatever happened to my self-confidence.
"If your name is Mrinalini, it doesn't mean that you will rot in this muddy swamp for the rest of your life. Understand your worth and recognise your identity like the lotus."
She commanded in a stern voice, whilst packing my bags. I only sat there heaving, feeling completely drained out. Nevertheless, I didn't want to go without informing Vivek, so we waited for him.
In the evening as soon as Vivek stepped in, he was stunned to see my luggage and Preeti. Before he could react, I went and stood in front of him.
"You never allowed me to talk, so even today, I'm going to say the minimum. Before I become insane, or do something drastic, I wish to break this cage, and fly away."
When I set foot outside Vivek's house, taking a deep breath, I actually felt like a free migrating bird!
Shamim Merchant, Mumbai___________________________________
Shades Of Simplicity
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